Off to Chiangmai! (IV)

TO BE BOLD IN REACHING OUT WITH WHAT I HAVE BEEN BLESSED WITH

I've always looked at myself very lowly. Right before the trip, I told my leader that I felt like I have nothing to contribute to the team. I do not have much knowledge of any kind of musical instruments, nor am I skillful in art and craft or drama. I am not good around kids, nor could I communicate well with people or express myself properly with words. But God has this special way of saying “Child, you're special in my eyes and you don't have to compare your talents with anybody else's.”

As we stepped into the kids' home, I noticed a guy who did not mingle with all the other kids. Later on i realised that he was mute and deaf. Never would I have thought that the little sign language that I knew could help him in feeling not left out. Lek and I even managed to bless him before we left. I also discovered this connection I have with kids that I never really felt before. The kids made me realise that it really isn't about my abilities and what I can offer to make myself feel useful. Instead, it really is about how willing I am to be used by God to show them His love. They don't want much, and all that they really crave for is to be loved.

I was forced into taking up the role of the main character in a skit that we were going to perform to a few groups of people. To be really frank, that was definitely something wayyyy beyond my comfort zone. I believe God can always use someone else from the team who can do a better job than me, but the only reason why I decided to give it a go in the end was 'cause of this small voice within me questioning me, "Didn't you say you want to step out in courage and reach out to others?”  As I see some of the kids tearing after the skit, I choose to believe that the skit made an impact in their lives. And more importantly, I choose to believe that it really was God speaking to them through the skit. Really, it was not how well the team can act but how mightily God can move hearts with the little that we are willing to offer.

To be continued.

Off to Chiangmai! (III)

TO GROW IN FAITH

I was also shown God's faithfulness even during adversities. Even when times we feel like God is non-existent, He'll still show up. There was this once during street evangelism when we were so discouraged by all the rejections that we were about to give up, God answered our prayers by sending us someone who, in turn, encouraged us so much. We actually bumped into her earlier in the day, but she was heading for breakfast and told us that she might listen to what we are going to share if we will still be around that area after her breakfast. After talking to so many people who just was not interested in what we've got to share, I was not having high hopes on this lady anymore, although I still made a quick prayer to God asking Him to let us meet this lady again. And we did! 

There was this other time when the power to an entire village blew up in front of us during a Christmas evangelistic event. It just had to happen when the local celebrity was sharing her testimony. Despite all this spiritual opposition closing up on us, our team chose to persevere in God's promise and to believe that He knows best, and that was the best plan at the moment. The short session of praise and worship and prayer really refreshed me so much. I was granted strength and reassurance that God will not forsake us and that He has already had the victory in His hands.

I have never heard of Pat complaining that he is tight on finances, nor that he is too tired to share the gospel. He told us that Mondays and Fridays are his free days, yet he doesn't use them to rest but still chooses to visit the orphanages and hospitals. Nonetheless, he also believes in finding rest and being recharged by spending time with God. He has inspired me to learn to trust in God’s provision because God is indeed our tower of refuge and our Provider. 

To be continued. 

Off to Chiangmai! (II)

TO LOVE AND TO FORGIVE

Love was one thing I struggled with for a long time. I tend to judge before loving - I look at people with my own lenses instead of God's, and I decide for myself whether they should be loved or not. I feel that some people need love, but I struggle so hard loving them knowing the things they have done to others. But God is love and is all about love. I've read so much about Biblical love, I know it so well in my head, and often I feel God's love in my life, too. However, I am so painfully human that I so easily get drowned in negative thoughts when circumstances creep into my life.

During this short trip to Thailand, I've seen what the radical love from up above can do to a person, in which even man could not contain it within oneself and had to share it with the world. I've experienced what it means to fully lay one’s life down and set aside all selfish ambitions to love God and love others. I've understood what it takes to obey God's calling to love others simply because He first loved us.

The people I have met throughout the trip were all so ready to love. The volunteers at The Ark Home spend most of their time just caring and loving the boys. I believe love brings a domino effect and it could be seen in the boys’ actions in just caring for one another. The team had to agree that the overflowing of God’s love really made a huge difference in the boys’ lives. Pat spends almost every day reaching out to all sorts of people, ranging from the sick to the poor to the needy. He so willingly give with what he has been blessed with.

Forgiving is often the first step. Acknowledging the wrongdoings of others yet choosing to look beyond them and still love the person as he is takes a lot of courage. But our God is a God who gives second chances because He loves us. He doesn't want to condemn us; instead He wants to restore our relationship with Him. He does not want us to live life like an orphan because we aren't meant to be one - we all have a Father and He is our Father.

I was also constantly reminded that mission is not just evangelising in a foreign country. Instead, it is an ongoing process in our daily lives. This reminded me a lot about my current situation at home. Pat's last words to me before we left were “Be the glue in your family, love them.” Yes, indeed it is easier said than done, but if God choose to look beyond all our transgressions and still says “I love you, child”, why can’t we do the same to others?

To be continued.

Off to Chiangmai! (I)

I didn't know what to expect from a mission trip. After signing up, I was told that most people will be pushed out of their comfort zones, doing things that challenge their  courage. The preparation period was not any easier since it took up more of my extremely limited time in my extremely busy semester. But now, looking back, I realised how important it was to be committed in preparing our hearts spiritually and mentally before we set off.

We spent a couple of days in my hometown doing some finalising work. We only learned our skit and song during those two days. I really thank God for having such supportive parents, always thinking of ways to help us make our stay there easier and more comfortable.

It was kind of surreal to me when it was finally time to leave home. This is my first mission trip in my life, and so all I wanted is to make it a memorable one in which God will teach me things that I have never before. I had three expectations of my own:

1. To learn to love and to forgive

2. To grow in faith of full reliance on God's provision and promises

3. To learn how to and gain the courage to reach out to others with what I am blessed with 

And a few others that were not in my initial expectations but resonate with other members of the team.

I've learned that God speaks to His people in many ways, and some of them will just give you jaw-drop moments. Through this trip, God has answered my prayers and showed me exactly what I needed to see at this stage in life. Now as I revisit the expectations that I had before I left home, I found out that every single one of them were achieved. How more amazing can God be?

To be continued.