Sometimes I'll think that I'm born to give up. I gave up on so many things in life of which, now looking back, I wish I hadn't. Being Asian, it isn't a surprise to be sent for badminton lessons, swimming lessons, calligraphy classes, ballet classes, piano lessons, art classes altogether in a week. If you think that's too much to bear for a child, I have friends who went for more classes than that in a week! I really wonder how they managed it.
As years pass, I just got so busy with life (this is the best excuse I came up with, which after all, isn't so convincing still) that I eventually quit all of these classes or lessons one after another. Now, I not only lost all my physical stamina, I wasted the opportunity to develop my talents too. I can hardly run, do laps in the pool, play the piano or guitar or paint anymore.
I remember how mom used to tell my brother and I that she sent us for piano classes so that one day we will be able to serve in church. Back then, I didn't see the importance of that. Now, whenever I see people serving in church, a small part of me gets jealous of their talents, but a larger part of me regrets on my lack of determination.
Thinking of how God gave everyone different gifts or talents, and that I've not put them into good use, or have I tried my best to discover them, i can't help but feel guilty at times. The next time I get an opportunity, giving up is no longer an option.
On a side note, I'm trying to pick up the guitar once again!
No comments:
Post a Comment